Lumpy fat

Weird title huh?

Not so weird if I tell you that is what is all over my body.

We are planning on renewing our passes to the local water park this year. We used them last year but not as much as we could. Many days my fat blob self didn't even want to leave the house. Plan is to use them as many days as we can this season. I believe this might be the last year the water park is open since the state will be taking control of the nature park next door in November. Not totally sure about that though.

 I hate the bathing suit that I bought last year. I went into Kmart and grabbed something retro looking that I thought would be cute. I never tried it on as I figured it would be fine.  It is a halter style tie top and I really hate it. Nothing makes your boobies look worse than a halter top bathing suit in my opinion.  Kmart has a coupon in this weeks flyer for 50% family bathing suits. I decided that with losing weight and wanting to get out more that I would be picking up a new suit. I found one that I liked and tried it on. (With undergarments of course) I thought I could get away with a size 18. While it fit it didn't cover up as much side boob as I wanted.  After I took it off I stood there in my sports bra and undies just poking and prodding my massive layer of fat. My top gut (as seen in pictures) is really misshapen and lumpy now.  I decided to head back out for another suit in a larger size.  I could not find anything else that I liked in a size 20. (ugh, I thought I was leaving that size)  I happen to see an employee fussing with the rack the suit I tried on was on. I went back over and realized that one hanger that said 18 had a size 20 suit on it. Yeah!  I went and tried it on and it covered a little bit more like I wanted.  I think it is actually really cute as it looks like a sundress.

Here it is

Then I felt guilty wanting to spend $22 (after coupon) on myself when I had a perfectly functional suit at home so put it back. I went to check out and was told that almost all Kmart rewards members got a $10 credit that expires Wednesday.  I went and grabbed the suit and am happy to say I bought it for $12 without guilt.  

Now I am home and making a healthy dinner for us.  I thought I was coming along really well with this whole weight loss thing but seeing myself in a dressing room mirror just slapped me in the face about how much I have left. Oh well, at least I am not in bed under the covers crying right?